cock cages – pure sexy on a stick

Among those who do teasing and denial, the method is pretty evenly split.  Some use a chastity device, while others use a no-touching or no-orgasm rule.  The latter just doesn’t appeal to me for a few different reasons.

If I’m doing it on willpower alone, then I’m essentially denying myself.  It feels like there’s no involvement from the one supposedly denying me.  It’s no different than spanking myself.  To me, t&d is about the connection between two people, not about what I can do to myself.  I’d much rather be under someone else’s control than decide to deny myself.

There there’s the issue of intensity.  With a cock cage, I’m forced to go further than I’d be able to go on my own.  I’m made to feel a higher level of arousal than I’d be able to achieve using only a rule.  There’s no choice, no way out; I have to keep going until she decides.  And that’s a sexylicious feeling.

A penis prison also serves as a reminder of the one who has me locked up.  Even when we’re apart, it constantly makes me think of her.  Every time I shower, pee, brush up against something, or get nekkid for any reason, she immediately jumps into my head.  Plus, any time I attempt to stimulate myself at all, it’s like having her hand there to block me.  It’s almost like playing with each other even when we’re not in the same location.

In a way, it also feels like a symbol of ownership.  Like a miniature collar around my goodies.  A way of saying, “This is mine.  You won’t get relief unless I say.”

Plus, a chastity device is like a portable form of bondage.  And bondage is just plain hot.  Struggling against bondage is an incredible experience.  It’s a wonderfully helpless feeling, being brought to an achingly hard state, then clawing desperately at the device in the vain hope of getting even a little relief.  The knowledge that no matter how hard I try, I won’t be able to orgasm unless the domme unlocks me, makes me realize that I’m totally at her mercy.  The power imbalance is delicious.  With a rule, this doesn’t happen; I can orgasm whenever I want to if I’m not locked up.

Another side benefit of using a device is that it’s incredibly sexy to look across the table and see the key dangling from her necklace.  It’s almost like she’s rubbing it in my face, taunting me with the fact that she can orgasm all she wants while denying me the same pleasure.

The key on the necklace also stimulates interesting conversations with others, so there’s potential for leading into some erotic humiliation, or even turning others on to t&d.

GOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!!!!

Elle commented on my last post, saying, “Ball kicking??? That sounds not so nice”.  I was going to reply in the comment section, but I think ball-kicking deserves an entry all its own.

(By the way, if you haven’t checked out her blog, pop on over and take a look.  Go ahead.  I’ll wait here.)

At first, the idea of being kicked in the balls scared me.  I’d had some experience with lighter ball-slapping and squeezing, and I got into that.  But kicking just seemed so far beyond what I’d experienced, so extreme, which made me reluctant.  Seeing video clips of kicking got me curious though.  It just looked so painfully sexy.

My first experience with ball-kicking came at a private party at the home of some friends.  I ended up getting teamed up on by two women from out of town in a cbt scene.  After that, I got a chance to explore it more in a relationship; as in any relationship, she was better at reading me than strangers were, which made it more intense with her.  Since then, it’s grown to be one of my favorite types of play.

I’m not talking about running-start full-swing kicks here.  Even pulling the leg back just a foot can provide lots of intensity.  Like any other type of pain play, warm-up is important.  During the warm-up, gentle slaps to the balls can register a 9 out of 10.  As the scene wears on, I can take more and more.

This type of play appeals to me on a few different levels.

First off, this is a type of pain which I translate as erotic.  Getting kicked in the balls (in this context) gets me achingly hard.  Some types of pain are erotic, some are non-erotic; this is the former for me.

This is also, in a way, using my foot fetish against me.  The target of my fetish is the same part causing me this intense pain.  Having to kiss and lick her feet after the scene adds even more eroticification, since I’m kissing the part of her body that just hurt me.

The perspective is wonderful as well.  Kneeling with my legs spread, knowing what’s coming, looking up at the domme………yowza.  Much of the time, the domme is clothed and I’m nekkid, which only adds to the feel of power imbalance.  Looking up in this situation, she seems 20 feet tall and incredibly powerful.

Immediately after a kick, as the pain explodes within me, I have no choice but to stay kneeling, with the domme towering above me.  This makes me feel deliciously helpless.  I can’t fight back at this point.  All I can do is look up and see her smiling, laughing, enjoying the pain she caused.

a couple of fantasies

There are two fantasies that have been doing laps in my head for a while now.  And I’m going to share them with you, because Barney says caring means sharing.

The first is to cum in a glass of the domme’s piss, then be made to drink it all.  I’ve been made to drink piss and eat my cum before, but the two combined seems to really crank up the “eew make it stop” factor.  Drinking the piss before an orgasm is hard enough; having to drink it after one seems like it’d be more intense and disgusting.  This is one of those types of play where, at the moment, I’m thinking “no no no I don’t want to do this this is disgusting yick eew stop it now!”………but later, I think, “Hey, that was really hot!”

The other fantasy involves one of these-

Ball-kicking and squeezing are my favorite forms of cbt.  These things look like they could be fun along those same lines.  But the description says that when it’s tightened down as far as possible, there’s 1″ of room between the plates.  I’m not sure that’d be enough to cause a more intense level of pain.

These things used to really scare me.  But since I’ve gained more experience with ball-kicking, I’ve grown to enjoy (I use that word loosely) more intense ball pain.

I’ve seen a few pics with these (or something similar) in use.  The guys’ balls look reeeeeally squished and sore.  Yum.  I wonder if there’s a way to modify it so it goes lower than 1″.  Then again, it might be better just to make one myself.  I could probably throw one together with stuff from the hardware store- a hinge, two pieces of material, and two bolts with wing-nuts.  I do like the clear top, so maybe I can find a piece of plexiglas or lexan.

On the other hand, I’m not sure just how far the boys can be flattened before rupturing.  Exploding testicles are not my idea of a good time.  Nor is a trip to the ER.

sexy slime slurping

My last relationship was the first in which I was made to eat my cum.  Not every time, since that would be too predictable, but probably about half the time.  It was enough to really make me wonder as I approached the edge of orgasm; was she going to make me lick up all of the slimy mess, or just hand me a couple paper towels?  I’d much prefer to just wipe it off, but sometimes I wasn’t given that option.

Being made to eat my cum isn’t something I ever thought I’d find erotic.  It’s actually pretty disgusting.  But that’s part of the appeal.  Being forced to do something disgusting can have an erotic quality to it.  It doesn’t taste all that great (though the taste can vary with diet) and the texture is just plain slimy.  Eew.  Feeling it slither down my throat sometimes makes me shudder a little.  Yet when I’m made to eat it, there’s a certain arousing quality, in spite of the yuck factor.  This is one of those things that has a contradictory yes/no quality to it; it turns me on, but at the same time, I really want it to stop.

What heightens this even more is that most guys experience a “drop” after cumming.  This doesn’t happen with tantric/nonejaculatory orgasms though.  This drop makes it much harder to lick it up. Approaching orgasm, I think, “If she makes me lick it up, that’ll be pretty hot.”  But after actually having the orgasm, it’s more of a, “Please, no, don’t make me do this, it’s gross.”

This displeasurable aspect heightens the sense of d/s between us as well.  It’s not something I want to do, but she’s making me do it anyway.  I feel smaller in a way, like she’s twenty feet tall.  I feel powerless and at her mercy.

As always, variety adds another dimension to this type of play.  There are so many ways to incorporate cum-eating into the scene- licking it straight out of her hand, sucking it off of her strap-on, licking it off her soles, cumming on her sock which is then used as a gag, slurping it off of her asshole, cumming in a glass of her piss before being made to drink it………the possibilities are endless.

Do you have any favorite methods that I didn’t mention here?  Or thoughts on cum-eating?  Let’s hear them!

grrrrrr

This past weekend, I went to a 2-day bdsm event in the next state with a few friends.  There were about ten other people there from our city as well, and over 200 others.  Lots of workshops during the day, and a party both nights.  Definitely a fun time.

On the second night, I ended up playing with a good friend, one of the people I carpooled with.  She’s always loads of fun to play with.  She rides that balance between sexy, fun, and “OW OW OW MAKE IT STOP PLEEEEASE!!!”.  We did cbt.  She tied my arms behind my back and sat in a chair, with me standing in front of her.  She started to slap my balls, first gently, then harder and harder.  Then she got out some rather large knitting needles and beat my balls with those for a while.

That was the warm-up.

Next she had me kneel down in front of her with my legs spread comfortably.  That’s when she started kicking.  Not full-force field-goal style kicks, but powerful enough to make me gasp, whimper, and, at one point, collapse to the floor.  Yum.

After a couple minutes of this, I started to get a bit lightheaded.  That’s not normal for me.  We’ve done this harder and longer in the past without any problems.  So I told her, and I sat down on the floor.  It kept getting worse, and everything started to get that weird boxed-in sound.  I laid on my back and put my knees up.  A couple minutes later, I felt better.  So that was the end of the scene.

This happened the last time we played too.  Same thing- lightheadedness during cbt, though the first time it wasn’t as intense as it was this weekend.  That first time, it was at a local party at a public dungeon.  But it was hot in that dungeon, so I attributed it to that.  This past weekend, it was fairly hot in the play space too, though not as bad as the dungeon here was.   So I’m not sure if I can chalk it up to the heat or not.  Apart from these two times, this has never happened before.  I’m thinking that if we can do this in private (we occasionally play privately) without any problems, then it’s got to be the heat.  She always keeps her place cool.  So if there are no problems at her place, then it’s the heat that did it.  But if it does happen, I’m not sure what to make of it.  Ball-kicking is one of my favorite types of play, and I’d much rather not have to give it up.

I’m pissed off that this happened at all.  It was right when things were getting nice and intense, right at that point when my brain is screaming “yes” and “no” at the same time. I feel like I disappointed her by taking away a great scene.  She’s made it clear that she knows it’s not my fault, and she’s not mad or anything.  But I am.  This shouldn’t have happened.

I did get to take my new impact implement case.  It came the day before we left, so I didn’t get a chance to modify the interior.  The foam needed removed in order to make it roomier.  I trimmed the foam some with a razor and used it; it worked, but didn’t look the greatest inside.  So I removed the foam once we got back, and right now I’m waiting for the glue to dry- I bought some foam batting and some red crushed-velvet-ish fabric, and I’m redoing the interior with that.

And while I didn’t get to try my new cane, it’s coming.  She wants to try that sometime, along with giving me a thorough spanking with vampire gloves.  I’m very much looking forward to that.

transporting my weapons of ass destruction

Last month, I bought another cane at a 3-day bdsm event.  It’s rattan, with heat-shrink tubing over the handle.  This is my first non-synthetic cane.  I’m excited, and I can’t wait to try it out.

When I went to put it in my case, I realized that I’m due for a new case.  I use a cue stick case for my impact implements.  But this case is getting smaller and smaller as I accumulate more toys.  So I ordered this one. It’s quite a bit roomier than the one I have now.

I like using a cue stick case since it’s inconspicuous and it saves me from having to sort through the myriad black bags at parties to find mine.  I keep my other toys (bondage gear, dildos, gags, nipple clamps, etc.) in this case, which also stands out from others peoples’ toy bags.  It kind of reminds me of the cases in movies that the bad guy usues to transport the stolen uranium.  Actually, this exact model case was used in a Leslie Nielsen movie, but I forget which movie.  They were on a train, and they kept disguises in it.  And I immediately recognized it as my toy case.  Anyway, these two cases stand out from the generic black bags that everyone else has, so I don’t have trouble looking for my cases at parties.  And I don’t have to worry about people accidentally grabbing mine instead of their own.

You may ask where I keep my floggers, since they obviously wouldn’t fit in a cue case like this along with all my other stuff.  I’m currently floggerless, and I’m not sure I’ll be getting one any time soon.  Some would consider that sacrilege, I know.  Floggers are one of the staples of peoples’ toy collections.  You can’t be an official card-carrying true real bdsmer™ without having at least one flogger.  I just don’t feel a pressing need to get a flogger though. There are plenty of other vicious implements which take up less room.  And depending how they’re used, they can be incredibly intense or mild enough to use for a warm-up.

So what do I keep in my mystical magical cue stick case?  How thoughtful of you to ask!  Let me take a quick inventory-

-a tawse
-a leather slapper
-a 21"-long wooden spoon with a 1/2"-thick handle.  wicked.
-a clear lexan paddle
-two synthetic canes, one medium thickness and bendy/whippy, the other very thin and stiffer
-my new rattan cane
-a crop
-a rather thin metal cane which is bent into a heart at the business end.  verrrry stingy.
-a short (18-20") flexible whip made of braided 550 cord

So I’ve currently got ten things in my impact case.  It’s kind of crowded.  I have to fit them in there a certain way in order to close the case.  (See, playing Tetris when I was younger paid off!)  I’ve got another crop which I won a while back as well as a smaller wooden spoon which won’t fit in the case.  Once my new case comes in, I should be able to carry all this with a little wiggle room.

take my breath away…

Breath play wasn’t always something that interested me.  But in my last relationship, after lots of queening, I was hooked.  I’m not talking about doing breath play to the point of passing out.  Just doing enough to make me really struggle and want that breath……and not be able to have it.

I went to a breath play workshop a while back.  One of the presenters said she does so much breath play (almost every day) that she was beginning to show signs of being a stoner……loss of short-term memory, getting slower mentally, etc.  There’s no way I’d want to take it that far. There’s no kink worth sacrificing my mind for.

I find it incredibly sexy to have that most basic need taken away from me.  Writhing beneath her, longing so desperately for air, knowing only she can provide it……..yow.  Pure sexy on a stick.  Not only that, but it adds immensely to the trust.  Of course, a certain level of trust is required to do breath play with someone to begin with.  But it multiplies the trust that’s already there once it’s done.  That feeling of total helplessness, of being so completely at her mercy, is beautiful.

There are so many ways to do this type of play too.  Queening is one of my favorites.  There’s also hand-over-mouth style and choking.  But with choking, that can be done two ways.  Some choke to cut off the carotids, which still allows breathing, but blood doesn’t get to the brain.  Not really my thing.  But the other kind of choking, where the air supply is cut off, that’s definitely more my speed.  Another method I’ve been curious about is using water-  preferably bound, with my head being held under.  This would work on multiple levels if piss was used instead of water.

When I first got my new printer last year, I was happy.  This was my first printer with a copier and scanner.  So I was excited to get it out of the box.  When I first pulled it out of the box, it was wrapped in a bag.  That bag immediately caught my attention.  Relatively thick, clear, with nothing printed on it, and no holes in it, which is rare.  It now occupies a spot in my toy case.

my cock is the center of the solar system

I’ve run into a few people recently who’ve complained that cbt is phallocentric.  My immediate response is typically “Well yeah!”  I mean, it’s a cock and balls. It can’t be anything other than that.  Impact play on the ass is ass-centric.  Foot play is foot-centric.  Nipple play is nipple-centric.  Every type of play involving a specific body part can be seen as whatever-centric.

But my next thought is that I don’t hear these same people complaining that breast bondage is tit-centric or that pussy torture is vagocentric.  Where are all their complaints with those types of play?

Let me explain something.  There are these people called “sadists”.  These sadists get enjoyment from causing pain.  Pretty simple, right?  Kicking someone in the balls, slapping his cock around, or squeezing his juevos are all painful.  Some sadists get off on doing this.  They enjoy it.  It’s not a case of the sub putting a gun to someone’s head and forcing her to torment his goodies.

To me, their vague complaints reek of the whole “men aren’t supposed to enjoy bdsm” attitude.  It’s perfectly fine for female masochists to get off on receiving pain, but not men.  Riiiiight.

I think the people who object to cbt as being phallocentric have deeper issues beyond some perceived phallic conspiracy.  It’s not a hard concept; some people find that kind of pain erotic.  It’s not a power trip.  It’s just hot.