I’m a horse…

…and I never knew it.  At least that’s what some people tell me.  They want me to be part of some “stable” of subs.  Invariably, I laugh and refuse to have any part of it.

Whether it’s romantic, sexual, emotional, or play, one-sided poly is not going to happen.  Period.  I’m not going to be faithful to someone who isn’t willing to give me the same.  Either it’s monogamy or poly; I’ve done both.  But if someone I’m with is going to try to hold herself to a different standard than she holds me to, we’re going to have problems.  If you want monogamy, we can do that.  If you want poly, then I’m going to have other partners as well.

Too often, the people espousing this lopsided arrangement want the benefits of poly without the responsibilities.  They want multiple partners, yet they can’t handle the jealousy they feel when their partners have someone else.  If you can’t handle it, don’t do it.  It’s called personal responsibility.  Try it sometime.

Some say, “You can only serve one person” or, “You can only have one domme.”  Why is that?  No one has ever been able to answer that question.  It’s very possible for some people to juggle multiple relationships.  If they’re talking about the emotional connection, it runs both ways.  Unless we’re talking about some online domme with an army of part-time wankers.  That’s more of a casual arrangement with guys who don’t want anything that takes up any real part of their lives.  Log in, role-play for a while, then get back to your life for a week or so.  That may work for some people, but for an in-the-flesh relationship, there are bound to be problems with this arrangement if any of the subs have a sense of self-worth.  The only exception I can think of is if both people have a cuckolding fetish.  Even then, it’d still be important to be on the same page as far as emotions, intimacy, and sex.

Why should I sit on a shelf and collect dust?  Why should I wait, unsatisfied, while the one I care about is getting her ya-ya’s out with someone else?  I deserve better than that.  Of course, that means I’m not a Real True Slave®.  I never claimed to be.

The whole “poly for dommes only” idea is a joke.

4 Responses to “I’m a horse…”

  1. Elle Says:

    I think that, as you said, it’s a way to play around without dealing with the jealousy of their partner playing around.

    Or it could be a way to exercise their power over their sub? I can do it but you can’t?

    In any case, I know Boy Toy would be ok if I did it. But I wouldn’t be if he did… So, for now anyway, there’s no question of me going elsewhere.

  2. pureliquidkink Says:

    “Or it could be a way to exercise their power over their sub? I can do it but you can’t?”

    That’s probably the case for some people who do this. But for most, I think it’s insecurity and jealousy as well as a desire to be free from personal responsibility. And many in the latter category will say that it’s a power thing so they won’t have to admit their problems.

    This setup seems to be much more common among those online than in person, which says a lot in itself. For them, a part-time, online-only arrangement works, even though they talk about total devotion and complete submission. In reality, this one-sided situation doesn’t work for most, regardless of any power-exchange implications. A d/s relationship is still a relationship, and both people need to be satisfied in order for it to work. For most people, being trapped in a relationship where they don’t feel fulfillment isn’t worth the time or effort.

  3. Elle Says:

    “A d/s relationship is still a relationship”

    Yes! In our case, we still have all the other things relationships have. Respect, communications, etc. Except we’re kinky 😉

    And except Boy Toy believes in free lovin, you know. And I’m too jealous or insecure to go there. But at least, I’ll admit it, and I won’t go and do it, yet prevent him to.

  4. pureliquidkink Says:

    Nothing wrong with monogamy. It’s my preference too.

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